Short Stuff: Five Page Critique

Monday, September 19, 2011

The first five pages of my bad luck Middle Grade are being critiqued at Adventures in Children's Publishing. We're on round 3 today. I'm entry number 4.

Would love it if you'd pop over and take a peek. Many thanks!

Note:
Revision 3
Revision 2
Revision 1
Original Entry

fairyhedgehog said...: Have I missed this? I only saw it today and can't find where I should go.; September 20, 2011 6:28 AM
Sarah Laurenson said...: It's still there, just further down. I added a direct link to my entry to this post.

Thanks, FHH!; September 20, 2011 7:18 AM
fairyhedgehog said...: Thanks! I'll go and look at it.; September 21, 2011 12:39 AM
j a zobair said...: Wow, Sarah! I've never seen this before so I didn't comment over there--I'm not sure if readers are supposed to be comparing to past versions?

In any case, I LOVE the voice in this. Your writing is rich and colorful--I love the three hairs he called a moustache and the cane snaking across the kitchen island and the father's hairless eyebrows--all of the rich details you provide. And I love the dialogue--it sounds just right for the kids, and I am so interested in the curse. I actually don't feel like I need that much more upfront. I would totally read on, and isn't that the point?

I can see my kids reading this.

Excellent!; September 21, 2011 12:24 PM
Sarah Laurenson said...: Thanks so much!

Commenting either place is great. I think this week is the last round and that should be up on Monday.; September 22, 2011 11:38 AM
stacy said...: Very nice!; September 25, 2011 4:20 AM
Sarah Laurenson said...: Today was the last of the revision postings. I added links to all 4 of the postings.; September 26, 2011 10:30 PM